My December
by Dread Pirate Roberts Number498
Summary: HxK. Hiei leaves Kurama because he believes that it will be better for him if he is gone. This story is about how wrong he really is. of course Rated T to be safe and future plot possibly.


(Author's note: Yet another KuramaxHiei story, I own nothing as usual. This one is very different from my last. Or at least I hope it will be, with my luck I'd end up copying my other one. But I am not going to explain much, you have to read it to find out more. This is my first attempt at something in first person so if anyone sees any mistakes please tell me about them. Please, please comment and review I am still a pretty new author and want feed-back. And to all of you who have read my other story thanks for reading this one. 'bows' Thanks for putting up with me!)

There he stood, the snow falling around him. I could only gaze at him in barely concealed awe; none of the snow was actually touching his pale skin, it all seemed to evaporate before it could reach him. I could feel the frost already clinging to my long red mane. Humans are normally very in tune to this little insignificant things.

"I can't say here anymore, I just can't do this to you Kurama." He said softly, his rather rough, low voice was carried on the slight wind, making the words echo in my ears. His tone was unemotional, as it was whenever he and I were speaking of something he would rather not talk about.

"I understand." I said my voice surprisingly steady, considering the situation. I even managed to smile at him. I knew it was half-hearted. But that is the kind of person I am. Always leave with a good impression and a smile. Oh, Inari I hate myself.

"I hate seeing you in pain, and us being together only causes that." He told me, looking up scarlet eyes not leaving my emerald ones.

"Don't worry about me. Do what you see fit." I said his firey eyes staring into mine. Usually they made me feel warm, but now they burned. Smoldering my soul. Now you can probably tell how shaken up this situation has me. I don't talk like that, let alone think like that. Poetic to some yet pathetic to me.

He shook his head, looking at the groun, smiling bitterly. "Always the same, kitsune. You put yourself at the bottom of the list. Hopefully when I'm gone that will change. But I still love you, you know that."

"Of course, and maybe when I see you again I will be different." I told him chuckling a bit. "I know that you won't change my...friend." I finished lamely. I didn't want him to leave at all, but I could tell that he wasn't going to stay. It would be foolish trying to change that. No matter how much I wanted to.

"I will come back Kurama. I promised." He told me turning away. Maybe I wasn't hiding my emotions well enough, could that be the reason why he wouldn't look me in the eyes. Could the hurt and desperation be visible?

"And I will wait for." I told him half-smiling. I had to almost bite my tongue to stop from moaning at how sappy that line was. What was I? Some crazed fan-girl? But that was at least one thing I had to look forward too. Him coming back. But when I had no idea. Demons didn't measure time. A human year would be nothing to him. I knew that it would feel like a lifetime before I would get to see him again. Maybe that is how long it would be.

I could feel the cold now, normally I loathed anything below thirty degrees and would be out of it in a instance but I hadn't really noticed it before now. The silence made it more apparent how icy it was.

He started to walk away, with every step it become more real that he was almost gone. I was frozen to the spot as I watched him depart, his dark figure standing out in the snow, my inhuman senses allowed me to observe his exit much longer than I would have normally if I was all human. I half-wished I wasn't human, I wouldn't feel the cold slowly entering my senses. Or maybe if I didn't have Youko's powers, then I would have never met Hiei and this never would have happened, my mother wouldn't have had to suffer as she did. The list goes on and on.

"Wai-," I began to call, but my words died before I could get them out. He didn't look back. And why should he? I wasn't good enough for him, he has bigger dreams than wasting his life with someone like me, I wasn't going to try and stop him for reaching those, I should be helping him, not holding him back, any...friend would do that. I probably don't have the right to even call him a friend, I'm so self-centered.

For some reason, Youko my demon half had been completely silent during this entire time. I was grateful and annoyed at the same time. I could think without anyone commenting but nothing to draw away from the pain of what had just happened. I didn't bother moving, I felt so numb. But of course it wasn't the cold that was getting to me.

I could hear nearby voices, but I didn't bother looking up. Three voices... and the crunch of snow.

Dictionairy:

Inari: Fox god, Youko thinks of him as God in my stories.

(That was chapter one. This story is still in the works so don't be surprised if I edit. Comments would be nice! I have no idea what my own stories sound like. Suggestions for future chapters are welcome as well for anyone who has some, I don't have much of a direction for this story yet... The inspiration for this came from many places the chief ones being my mind, music, and the books I've read recently.)


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